This interview is for "Hailing Hellions," a Q&A series where I interview sex workers (or ex-sex workers) who have modeled for me and my Sex Positivity* book project. Today's guest is Cosmos Wanderlust! This is the SFW version; click here for the SFW-version interview compendium!

*The longer title being Sex Positivity versus Sex Coercion, or Gothic Communism: Liberating Sex Work under Capitalism through Iconoclastic Art (2023). Part of an overarching movement that connects sex positivity to what I call "Gothic (gay-anarcho) Communism," Sex Positivity essentially provides a hybrid; i.e., one established between academic (Gothic, queer, game and Marxist) theories, and wherein applied theory towards universal liberation is achieved by challenging Capitalist Realism (the inability to imagine a world beyond Capitalism) at a grassroots level. To it, Gothic Communism specifically occurs through direct mutual worker action and informed intersectional solidarity relayed through Gothic poetics: BDSM, monsters, and kink, but specifically what I call "ludo-Gothic BDSM." 

General CW: BDSM, Gothic content and theatrics (e.g., rape play and death theatre), as well as sex worker abuse and bigotry of various kinds (variable per interview); discussions of sex work, underwear photos/photos of sex toys, and fascism

Concerning Images, Censorship and Permissions: All images are of the model or myself unless otherwise stated. As this is the SFW version of the interview, the images are relatively tame, cropped or censored; to see the spicier stuff each model offers, go to the NSFW version of this series on my website. Any publicly available images are exhibited for purposes of education, transformation and critique, thus fall under Fair Use; private nude material and collabs with models are specifically shared with permission from the original model(s). For more details about artist permissions, refer to the book disclaimer.

About the series: Like the book series it attaches to, "Hailing Hellions" aims to educate and critique; i.e., by raising awareness towards sex worker rights, but also gender-non-conformity through Gothic counterculture. This extends to gender identity (e.g., trans, enby or intersex) but also orientation and performance; i.e., BDSM and sex positivity through various Gothic theatrical roles that invite things beyond vanilla, heteronormative (thus conservative, reactionary and harmful) sexuality. I would consider this to be things like mommy dommes and consent-non-consent, breeding fantasies and heavy metal (e.g., Satanic material and the Gothic at large). Also, these questions are broader insofar as they cover wide praxial/poetic ideas and concepts. Regarding these, the opinions of the subject and myself are not identical, but often overlap through us collaborating together to raise awareness.

About the interviewee: Cosmo is someone I met on Bluesky while looking to continue working with SWers after my book series concluded (re: "It Began with a Whisper," 2025). In short, I saw his work recently, liked it, and decided to reach out; he responded, and we went from there!

0. Persephone: Hi, everyone! My name is Persephone van der Waard. I'm a trans-woman erotic artist, sex worker, writer/author and researcher who specializes in cross-media studies; i.e., I have my independent PhD in Gothic poetics and ludo-Gothic BDSM (focusing on partially on Metroidvania).

Cosmo, could you introduce yourself and share a little about yourself with our audience?

Cosmo: Hi! I'm Cosmo! I'm a bit newer in terms of sex work goes, but I'm hoping that being new adds a bit of an unpolished charm to me. I'd describe myself as transmasc, but I'm still pre-op. I'm hoping that my audience will stick around and watch me grow.

1. Persephone: This book project views sex positivity as a liberating act. What does sex positivity mean to you? Illustrating mutual consent; i.e., can porn illustrate mutual consent when sex workers are constantly dehumanized by the profit motive and the status quo?

Cosmo: I think being sex-positive means being open and unashamed to talk about your preferences, history, and wants. Of course, keep the context and place in mind. Don't talk about this stuff in front of kids. But I think society is too quick to shame people for liking sex, especially if it's their job. Almost everyone engages with sex or porn to some degree, but most always treat it as a taboo subject.

2. Persephone: In your mind, what is the biggest struggle facing sex workers today?

Cosmo: I think the biggest struggle comes to people that engage in in-person prostitution. Not only is their profession illegal in most places, but its illegality comes with additional risks, such as not being safe to report abuse or SA for fear of being arrested themselves. There's also this stigma against them to where they must "deserve" being abused or worse because of a profession that very well might not have been their first choice. We even see this attitude with virtual sex workers such as porn actors or onlyfans models, that we deserve bad things simply because we cater to a market everyone's ashamed to admit that they are a part of.

3. Persephone: How do you feel about sex work being work, thus paying sex workers for their labor? This can be unions, but also their representations in media at large.

Cosmo: If you get paid for it, it's work. I'd also like to see positive reputation for the sex work industry, as it's rarely portrayed as a desirable job. The only positive representation I've seen was during Inside Job, where in a throwaway joke, one of the characters managed to accidentally legalize and unionize sex work across the country.

4. Persephone: What are your thoughts on Communism vs Capitalism using Gothic poetics? Can monsters be gay Commies?

Cosmo: I don't know much about Gothic poetics, but Capitalism hasn't worked for the US in the long term. We literally had to make laws that cripple it because of monopolies, but even those don't seem to be working now such as with Amazon having a stranglehold on several industries and YouTube being pretty much the only option for independent video platforming. At the very least the richest among us should contribute in taxes. Elon Musk has enough money to solve world hunger, but he'd rather make dick rockets instead.

5a. Persephone: What drew you to the project/interested you in working on it together with me?

Cosmo: The project seemed interesting, I haven't gotten very many requests for anything, so they were fun to do. I was also hoping that it would widen my reach a little bit.

5b. Persephone: How has that experience been for you? Can you describe it a little?

Cosmo: It's been very positive so far. You've been very understanding and respectful of my limitations and boundaries.

6. Persephone: If you feel comfortable talking about it, can you talk about being GNC? What does that mean to you?

Cosmo: For starters, I know that for a lot of trans people, their dysphoria comes from whether or not they pass. That's valid, and I'm not trying to argue otherwise. But for me, my dysphoria doesn't come from being feminine or being perceived as female. It comes from the fact that I have tits and no peen. I still like conventionally feminine things and clothing. I don't dislike my mannerisms. There are plenty of cis men who enjoy femininity, and so do I.

7. Persephone: What do you enjoy most about sex work? What got you started in it?

Cosmo: Well, it was definitely something to think about for a while. Not only because of its negative perception, but because if you have that job history, you're basically locked out of several professions. But for me, the most appealing aspect was the convenience. I can post whenever I have time, which can be beneficial when your day job has wildly variable hours.

8. Persephone: Do you have a favorite piece of sex work that you've done, in terms of custom material?

Cosmo: My favorite piece is actually something that I haven't released yet because I'm still working on it. Basically its a veeeerry long written space erotica that explores several themes of belonging. It's also an experiment on how many kinks I can fit into a piece of media.

9. Persephone: Do you friends and family know about the work that you do? How do you talk about it with other people who aren't sex workers; i.e., how do you communicate sex worker rights to non sex workers?

Cosmo: A few of my coworkers and my sister know. Sister has told me that she supports me, but doesn't want to hear about it, which is understandable. Coworkers are variable. The one most open about it is OK for hearing generalizations, but not of the details. But most seem to agree that sex work wouldn't be an industry without demand for it, and that workers should have protections like with any other industry.

10. Persephone: What are your thoughts on TERFs in sex work; i.e., those who devalue GNC minorities (and other marginalized groups) in the same profession?

Cosmo: Negative. They don't understand that the people who devalue GNC minorities are the same that devalue themselves for just being sex workers. That's on top of everything else.

11. Persephone: How do you feel about billionaires? Israel and Palestine?

Cosmo: No one needs to have a net worth of a billion dollars. It's just hoarding money at that point. As for Palestine, the conflict shouldn't have had to reach the point it is now. People more eloquent and informed than I am have spoken about all the atrocities Israel has done. They shouldn't have had to give up their land to establish Israel in the first place, but at this point, I don't see this ending at all favorably for the Palestinians.

12a. Persephone: What are some of your favorite GNC pieces of media (e.g., I love Sense8 and Heartbreak High)? Do you have any GNC role models?

Cosmo: Jamie Raines I would say is a good irl role model, but he's a lot nicer to people than I am. I'm also a fan of Sense8, but I wish it didn't get canceled. Same with Paranormal Park. There's also the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, but the ending was awful. Wendell and Wild is a stop motion movie I like with a trans character as well. I know that a lot of people have mixed feelings about Vivzipop, but I like that you know that Sally Mae is trans by just paying attention to the world of the show rather than it being told to the audience.

(source)

12b. Persephone: To that, GNC people often find their families outside of their birth families; did you have to go elsewhere for that, or is your family relatively understanding of your queerness.

Cosmo: Mine was understanding. My dad even kind of figured it out before I did. But we already had a bit of a buffer when my sister came out as gay years ago.

13. Persephone: What about sex workers? Do you have anyone you look up to in particular?

Cosmo: I like Noah Way, but not because of his NSFW content, ironically enough. I was familiar with him from his Instagram before learning he did porn, too. I like that he actually talks about important stuff with his platform.

14. Persephone: There's often a strong theatrical component to sex work and BDSM; i.e., costumes, gender roles, aesthetics of power and death, music, makeup. How do these things intersect for you, and do they cross over into real life for you? For example, do you find yourself wearing similar clothing and expressing yourself sex-positively when you're not on the clock?

Cosmo: I typically wear more comfy clothes irl, but I wouldn't buy something if I didn't at least think it was cute. I post a lot of sock pics, but I just genuinely, non-sexually, like socks. Repeated advice I hear is to be genuine, so I typically don't act too dissimilarly than I do in real life besides being more confident.

15. Persephone: There's often an animal component to sexuality and gender expression, helping workers establish close bonds with each other and nature; i.e., furries, but also therians and various kinks; e.g., puppy play. How do you feel about these things, be they for work, pleasure, or both?

Cosmo: As long as there's no real animals involved and everyone is consenting and safe, I treat it as none of my business. Personally, I'm not really into animal play. I think I'm drawn to monsters partly because I know they're not real.

16. Persephone: Sex workers are generally treated as monsters to harm and exploit under capital. Do you have a preferred way of expressing the humanity of sex workers, be that simply stating it or through the work that you do, art, or some combination, etc?

Cosmo: I guess I start by trying to point out that making sex work illegal just forces it underground where there are less protections for the workers. I also try pointing out that they wouldn't have jobs without demand for it, and that in this economy, everyone is trying to find anything to help them stay housed and fed. I'm not sure if I'm at the point where I can articulate this through my own work yet, though.

17. Persephone: Do you have a particular aspect of liberation you like to focus on; e.g., fat liberation or decriminalizing sex work? To that, what's the difference between positive thinking and liberation in your eyes?

Cosmo: I generally advocate for treating everyone with respect and dignity whether that be fat people, sex workers, or anyone else. There's obviously work to do like teaching people that racism isn't always overt hatred for another race, getting doctors to actually listen to fat people and women when they have medical concerns, making sure disabled people actually have access to information and jobs, etcetera. Liberation starts when you start advocating for actual change that improves the lives of everyone.

18a. Persephone: How do you feel about BDSM and using calculated risk to confront and heal from trauma? I.e., using collars or whips to experience pain or control as pleasurable, not harmful (I love collars, for instance).

Cosmo: I think using it as a form of therapy probably isn't the wisest idea, but I think as long as it's done safely, it can be a way to begin to change your perception of something stemming from a negative experience into a pleasurable one.

18b. Persephone: Was there ever a moment where you were on the fence about BDSM or sex work/in the closet, but something happened that changed everything? I.e., was it gradual or more a singular event that motivated you to change; or, were you always kind of out (for me, I decided to change after several bad exes, but also watching Stranger Things, and relating to Max's brush with Vecna in a GNC way)?

Cosmo: I basically was upfront about my sex work with my sister from the beginning. It took me a bit to think everything over before starting it, though. Part of it was to help raise funds for my bottom surgery, but I haven't seen anyone with what I want do sex work before. I didn't even know what I want is an option before I saw a random comment about it on Instagram. I also want to help dispel right-wing lies that you completely lose your sex drive after bottom surgery as well.

21. Persephone: In your mind, is BDSM inherently sexual? If so or if not, can you explain why?

Cosmo: Some people just like being bossed around or reprimanded. Bootcamp in the army seems to have a similar dynamic to listening unquestionably to an authority figure, but that's not sexual.

22. Persephone: Does BDSM inform the sex work that you do in an educational or therapeutic way?

Cosmo: I have a neutral opinion of BDSM. It's just another kink that I don't feel either way about.

25. Persephone: What's the most stressful thing about sex work? The most liberating?

Cosmo: The most stressful thing is promotion and growing your audience. From the advice I read, a good portion of subscribers don't renew. So you have to be getting as many or more new ones each month in order to keep momentum up. I guess the most liberating is that I have complete creative control. I don't have to make a custom or have a setting session if I don't want to. You might have to follow tos for your pages, but they're otherwise yours to do with.

26. Persephone: What are the benefits to doing sex work in today's day an age versus in the past? What do you think needs to improve; e.g., open reactionary bigots versus moderate SWERFs posturing as feminists speaking for all groups?

Cosmo: The internet gives people the ability to platform themselves, but there's a lot of infighting and competition. On reddit, a lot of the NSFW subreddits are run by agencies that artificially uplift their own models, and ban you if you start getting popular. A lot of models will also down vote you themselves. But people immediately having a negative reaction to OF creators will always be an issue. Even if you're 100% solo and the only stuff you post are lewds, as soon as you monetize your body, suddenly everything you do makes you worthless.

27a. Persephone: What are your favorite monsters (i.e., undead, demons, and or anthromorphs) and why?

Cosmo: I like tentacles and aliens. Aliens are basically an open book that can really test what kind of craziness you can come up with. But I wish creature cocks would be a little more creative. I get that centaurs are half horse, but can't they be a little more creative than just making a horse dick? You'd think fantasy would get the juices flowing.

27b. Persephone: Media-wise, do you like to read, watch movies, and or play videogames just for fun, but also to gather ideas about gender-non-conformity expression, BDSM and other sex-positive devices?

Cosmo: I like to read and play video games. D&D and similar settings have long been the source of dirty fantasies for a lot of people. The plethora of sentient races helps, I think.

28. Persephone: What are your thoughts on sex/porn and art, business and pleasure? I like to mix them to form healthier boundaries established between workers; how do you feel about this

Cosmo: I just don't want anyone I know irl at this moment to view my porn. Right now, that'll still be really awkward. I don't know any other sex workers irl, so I don't need to worry about that quite yet. But online, I don't mind mixing the two as long as everyone's boundaries are respected.

29. Persephone: Per my arguments, Capitalism sexualizes and fetishizes all workers to serve profit, leading to genocide. Keeping that in mind, what is the best way to achieve intersectional solidarity using Gothic poetics?

Cosmo: I honestly don't think I have a good answer for this. I don't think there's a single answer to fix everything capitalism has done, especially considering that there's a lot of people still in support of it despite the state it left everything in. A lot of people literally go out of their way to be as unempathetic as possible. How are we supposed to reach solidarity with people with that mentality?

30. Persephone: Can you describe your own struggles with achieving liberation/humanization as a GNC sex worker?

Cosmo: I'm still new, so I don't think I have a concrete answer. But I've started to get a larger audience just by having community with other sex workers. Playing into my talents, like writing, also seemed to help.

31. Persephone: I view sex work as an important means of de facto (extracurricular) education; i.e., entertainment, but also a means of humanizing people within the practice at large. How do you feel about this? Can we learn from art and porn as a means of humanizing marginalized groups?

Cosmo: It honestly depends. Some people just want to hate others or are just too set in their ways. Others will also just see smut as smut and only take it at face value. I think it can help middle of the road or undecided people, possibly.

32. Persephone: I value establishing mutual trust, healthy communication and boundary formation/negotiation and respect, seeing them to be the most vital qualities in any relationship. Do you agree, and if so, why?

Cosmo: Yes, that's basic respect. All relationships should have boundaries, trust, and negotiations.

33. Persephone: How do you orient and what are your thoughts on polyamory insofar as it affects your work? For the layperson/uninitiated, how would you describe the difference between a fuck buddy/FWB and other more casual relationships versus serious ones? Can people be friends and still have sex in a casual manner? What is the most valuable aspect of a friendship regardless if sex is a part of the equation or not?

Cosmo: I've never been in a relationship, so I don't feel like I can speak on this. As long as everyone is consenting and knowledgeable about who is sleeping with who, I don't see the issue. It's very much a "not my circus" kind of situation. But I've seen people remain friends while still sleeping together. It's not impossible to do. What's important in a friendship is that they actually care about you and are willing to help and support you when you need it, and vise versa.

36. Persephone: What advice would you give incels, nice guys and other cis-het men (or token groups; e.g., TERFs and cis-queer tokens, etc) displaying bigoted attitudes towards women and other marginalized groups?

Cosmo: I've seen people speak on how they were down that path, but got off simply because someone they were conditioned to hate was nice to them and spoke to them reasonably. For example, Contrapoints is referenced a lot by such people.

37. Persephone: Likewise, what advice would you give to more privileged groups that need to understand the value of listening to those more oppressed than them in a larger struggle for liberation?

Cosmo: If you're not a part of the group you advocate for, you actually need to listen to what they want. Otherwise you're just infantilizing them thinking that you know best. It's performative at best.

38. Persephone: What are your thoughts on GNC people who are still in the closet but thinking about coming out? Where should they go and who should they talk to?

Cosmo: It depends heavily on several factors: if they are in a physically safe place, if there's a real chance of getting kicked out of their home, if someone's monitoring their internet usage. If they're safe, then by all means, do so. If not, make sure you have a backup plan and all your important documents and a place you can stay in case things turn sour.

39. Persephone: Similarly, for those thinking about doing sex work for the first time, where is a good place to start with that; i.e., what advice would you give to those starting out based on your own experiences?

Cosmo: I'd advise to really think about it before getting into it. To actually be profitable, you basically have to be a social media influencer. Most people on Fansly or OF only make a few hundred a month, so don't get into it if you think you're going to make six figures within a year.

40a1. Persephone: What's your idea of the perfect date? The ideal fuck? Do you have an ideal experience of either you'd like to share?

Cosmo: I like art museums and festivals. Botanical gardens are always fun. So far, I've just been disappointed sexually with people irl, so I just take care of everything myself.

40a2. Persephone: What's your wildest/most enjoyable sexual encounter (e.g., sex in public, in the kitchen while the roomies are home, etc)?

Cosmo: I'm actually pretty boring irl. I currently live alone, and I'm not the kind of person to have sex in public.

40c. Persephone: What are your thoughts on consensual voyeurism and exhibitionism as educational/entertaining acts? Does being able to be more open and communicative help us learn from each other to see each other as human and also what to watch out for/what to challenge at a systemic level?

Cosmo: There's definitely people who'll only think of it as free entertainment. But I think being more open, generally, can help see sex as less of a taboo subject.

41a. Persephone: Does fucking to music, roleplay and other theatrical elements make sex better?

Cosmo: I think it can help set the mood, but I don't think its a 100% guarantee that it does.

42. Persephone: If you have any ace leanings, would you like to talk about that in relation to the work that you do?

Cosmo: I think so. A lot of my sexual feelings feel like an itch I need to scratch rather than an emotional or physical needs I have to fulfill.

43. Persephone: Connections between sex workers and clients is often discrete under capital. Can a degree of friendship and intimacy make for a better relationship between the two?

Cosmo: At least a sense of familiarity can. If you're a repeat customer, I'm more willing to work with you. But if it's your first time working with me, I don't usually leave much wiggle room to negotiate unless other sex workers can vouch for you.

44. Persephone: For people struggling with gender expectations like being the right size or pleasing one's partner and enjoying oneself, is there anything you might recommend?

Cosmo: Getting to a point where your comfortable with yourself will make you comfortable with your partner, whatever that might be. If you get to that point and you're still not comfortable, perhaps they might not be the right one for you. I know what my internal bone structure is. Additionally, I will never be conventionally skinny no matter how much I diet or work out. There are certain things about yourself that for better or worse, can't be changed. With current science, I'll never be able to shoot a load or get hard in the same way that a cis man can, either. Learning to unlearn these societal expectations of beauty and sex can help with letting go of the constant pressure many find themselves under.

45. Persephone: How does it feel being your true self, despite the risks of gay panic and similar moral panics in America and around the world?

Cosmo: I'm kind of in a weird spot. Because I'm gender-non-conforming, I feel like I don't get as much negative attention from cis people on the daily, but there's always going to be a subset of transmedicalists who think I'm a tender because I don't conform to conventional masculinity and don't really care about passing. Obviously, there's several countries that I flat out can't travel to due to safety concerns, and my options for asylum in the worst case scenario are limited as well. I can't control how other people think about me, so I just go about my business and don't really think about them.

46. Persephone: Is there anything else you'd like to say or add before we conclude?

Cosmo: I'm planning to expand my social media presence once I reach 100 videos. Be sure to follow me for a more intimate space while it lasts. I'm also hoping to get my bottom surgery within the next few years. To help me with that goal sooner, be sure to subscribe and purchase content! There aren't too many creators out there with both sets of genitals, so I'll need help if you want to see it faster.

47. Persephone: Thanks for taking the time to answer these questions, and also for working on Sex Positivity with me. If people want to follow you, where can they follow you and support what you do?

Cosmo: I'm on both Onlyfans and Fansly, but I also upload videos to Manyvids. I'm currently largely active on Bluesky, but I'm also on Reddit even though I haven't posted there in a while. I accept tips via OF, Fansly, CashApp, Throne, or Ko-fi. Check out my Throne if you want to help me expand my toy or apparel collection or just to spoil me. All my accounts are with the same username: thecosmocorner (not currently on Instagram, Twitter, or TikTok. I'll add a link to my Linktr.ee when I am). I'm also open to doing certain content that isn't allowed on either OF or Fansly up to a point. Usually nothing that would directly involve me bleeding, public, or revealing my face to anyone. I'm also up for selling my clothing as well, I just can't explicitly say so on OF or Fansly. If there's an article you're interested in, please contact me on either Reddit or Bluesky. If you can't pay via tip to one of the 18+ sites, I'm going to ask for an ID if not obviously an adult (everything but birthdate and expiration censored).